Still full of grace

I got on the plane in Indianapolis just as my name was put into nomination as one of the four candidates for the fifteenth Diocesan Bishop of Connecticut.
For the next two hours I read and listened to music. When the plane touched down at IAH, I immediately turned on my phone. There was a text from my shepherd, Marian: Ian is 20 votes shy of election. Then there was a voicemail, from Ian, saying that one of his first post-election acts was to give me a call. The Holy Spirit spoke and the people of Connecticut listened and acted–The Rev. Dr. Ian Douglas was elected Bishop.
Of course I was sad. Of course I was disappointed. But as the afternoon and the rest of the day wore on I received many wonderful emails, phone calls, more texts and even had a vase of roses delivered to me before the afternoon was over. I was clearly called to continue as rector of St. Mary’s in Cypress. The conversations that I had had with the people of Connecticut were rich and fruitful; the gift of the process was what had been most important.
Today at St. Mary’s there was applause and many, many words of joy from the parish. I realized that I felt lighter than I had in months–and not from those 24 Weight Watcher pounds lost since July. I had been most willing to serve God in Connecticut, but carrying the possibility of that very challenging call (because I wasn’t the one called to do it) with my day to day ministry in Texas had been more difficult that I had realized.
I am sorry not to be moving nearer my daughter and to a beautiful part of God’s creation. I am disappointed not to be living in a place with seasons. I will miss my relationship with the wonderful people of Connecticut. But I am at peace and feel joy rising. It is a very good place to be.

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